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People who are healing from toxic love relationships exercise well to educate themselves on the nature of the emotional corruption sustained then that they can movement through their pain to a place of healing.

In my individual work with people who have uncovered that they were involved in a romantic human relationship with a person with narcissistic qualities, 1 of the kickoff things nosotros practise in psychotherapy is to work together to empathise the psychology behind narcissistic abuse recovery. Putting together the pieces of the puzzle and empowering the person to narrate their story is essential in the reality testing and back up of a survivor of narcissistic abuse.

What Is Cerebral Dissonance in Toxic Relationships?

As mentioned in my previous articles on this field of study, it is not my practice to label people with "weather" or "disorders." I am a strengths-focused therapist, and very solution-focused in my practice with people in therapy. However, when I work with people who are leaving toxic relationships, it helps to understand the nature of the emotional corruption in guild to fully conceptualize and process their reality of the experience. Narcissistic abuse is an insidious, covert form of emotional abuse that tin can happen to unsuspecting individuals who are entangled in a human relationship with a person with narcissistic qualities.

One of the central methods of emotional abuse employed by people with narcissistic tendencies is the generalized concept called cognitive dissonance. What this abuse tactic does is create in the target a sense of unreality, confusion, and a mind-set of not trusting their own perception of the situation. Leon Festinger (1957) was one researcher who studied the theory of cognitive dissonance. Essentially, cognitive dissonance occurs when humans experience a country of property two or more contradictory thoughts or beliefs in their noesis at one time. The result is a country of anxious defoliation and a desire to reduce the resultant overwhelm and unbalanced perception.

Cerebral Dissonance in Narcissistic Abuse: A Snapshot

A simplistic, condensed case in a toxic relationship: an abuser professes dear and divines a matrimony appointment with their partner. The partner is courted, romanced, and ultimately falls in love with the abuser, not knowing that the abuser has ulterior motives (i.e., not staying in the relationship). The partner envisions nuptials details and enjoys the courtship, flowers, and existence placed on a pedestal. The abuser so suddenly makes a annotate denying they said anything near getting married. They get on to say the partner is "crazy" for thinking that. Blame is then projected upon the partner, and the partner is dizzy with confusion, recalling that, indeed, their significant other did talk over wedding bells and a future together.

The partner then experiences a state of cognitive dissonance—a hazy unreality of confusion. Such emotional corruption renders the target confused and reeling with heartache that the pace of the relationship has slammed to an abrupt halt, in addition to feelings of expose and being blamed.

Gaslighting: Another Insidious Form of Narcissistic Cognitive Dissonance

Some other common tactic of emotional abuse employed by individuals with egotistic issues is "gaslighting." This term was coined after a movie titled Gaslight (1944) in which a form of psychological abuse resulting in cognitive dissonance occurred for the main character, played by Ingrid Bergman. The consequence of gaslighting is that the target of abuse doubts their own reality of the situation because the abuser is trying to misfile and disorient the target in society to maintain power and control, all at the cost of the emotional well-being of the target.

Some other instance of gaslighting in the movies would exist the Julia Roberts character as the target of corruption in Sleeping with the Enemy (1991). In her state of affairs, her abuser would announced as a stalker in her house by straightening out the bath towels. Roberts' graphic symbol knew that her partner was particular about cleanliness and order, then when she thought she was alone in the business firm, she found out she was not by seeing straightened bath towels arranged eerily in club. This gaslighting resulted in Roberts' character doubting her reality and feeling a land of psychological terror. In circumstances where emotional abuse occurs outside of Hollywood films, oft the "gaslighting" is verbal or emotional, placing the target of abuse in a state of perpetual confusion.

Using Validation to Diffuse Cognitive Dissonance

Cognitive dissonance is diffused and reduced when the survivor of narcissistic corruption is able to receive validation and confirmation of the reality of their circumstances. Narrating the story can take identify verbally in psychotherapy sessions and/or via the employ of journaling exercises. Although this is just the starting time of the healing process, mastering the trauma associated with narcissistic abuse ensues when the target has unconditional, positive regard, validation for their experience, psychoeducation about the nature of narcissistic corruption recovery, and empowerment every bit they move through the emotions associated with grief/trauma recovery.

Being able to vocalize or write well-nigh the particulars of the experience releases the trauma and enables the survivor to reduce cognitive dissonance and keep with the healing work. Talking to a licensed, empathetic therapist can be one helpful footstep in moving toward healing.

There are many more steps in the healing process, but working through cognitive dissonance is a fundamental, initial component in reducing trauma and anxiety in survivors of emotional corruption.

© Copyright 2014 GoodTherapy.org. All rights reserved. Permission to publish granted past Andrea Schneider, LCSW

The preceding article was solely written by the author named above. Any views and opinions expressed are not necessarily shared past GoodTherapy.org. Questions or concerns near the preceding article can be directed to the writer or posted as a comment below.

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Source: https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/unreality-check-cognitive-dissonance-in-narcissistic-abuse-1007144

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